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For if he like a madman lived, At least he like a wise one died.

Modern capitalism is not about free markets, it is about building sufficient mass that the market gravitationally collapses around you.

The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of an expanding bureaucracy.

No one can earn a million dollars honestly.

No one can earn a million dollars honestly.

The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.

The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.

What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.

You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it.

I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.

Black holes are where God divided by zero.

Black holes are where God divided by zero.

Black holes are where God divided by zero.

The worst barbarity of war is that it forces men collectively to commit acts against which individually they would revolt with their whole being.

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?

If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and no-one dares criticize it.

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.

Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis.

UNIX is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.

UNIX is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.

They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction.

They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction.

Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proven it correct, not tried it.

I have spoken many a word, therefore, it is fact.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

Ah well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.

Ah well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.

Having the source code is the difference between buying a house and renting an apartment.

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.

Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

Real Programmers always confuse Christmas and Halloween because Oct31 == Dec25 !

Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.

I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

The cynics are right nine times out of ten.

Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.

There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.

There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.

There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.

Having the source code is the difference between buying a house and renting an apartment.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis.

There are many kinds of people in the world. Are you one of them?

There are many kinds of people in the world. Are you one of them?

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.

An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

The covers of this book are too far apart.

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.

An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.

It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.

Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.

To err is human -- and to blame it on a computer is even more so.

To err is human -- and to blame it on a computer is even more so.

The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.

Gravity cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.

We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.

We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.

We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.

We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.

I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.

If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track

Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.

Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.

A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF All my base are belong to you!

Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF All my base are belong to you!

Write a wise word and your name will live forever.

Men have become the tools of their tools.

Men have become the tools of their tools.

A hen is only an egg&Acirc;’s way of making another egg.

A hen is only an egg&Acirc;’s way of making another egg.

A hen is only an egg&Acirc;’s way of making another egg.

Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism.

Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism.

You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it.

There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.

A picture is worth a thousand words (which is why it takes a thousand times longer to load...)

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.

The full use of your powers along lines of excellence.

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.

DOS Computers manufactured by companies such as IBM, Compaq, Tandy, and millions of others are by far the most popular, with about 70 million machines in use worldwide. Macintosh fans, on the other hand, may note that cockroaches are far more numerous than humans, and that numbers alone do not denote a higher life form.

Silence is argument carried out by other means.

If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.

We are Dyslexia of Borg. Fusistance is retile. Your ass will be laminated.

Computer /nm./: a device designed to speed and automate errors.

Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.

Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.

Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.

Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.

Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.

When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.

When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.

Invading Iraq after 9/11 was like invading Mexico after Pearl Harbor.

A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five.

If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.

War is not the continuation of politics with different means, it is the greatest mass-crime perpetrated on the community of man.

In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.

I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather... not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car...

I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather... not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car...

Opportunities multiply as they are seized.

The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.

I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.

I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.

C combines all the power of assembly language with the ease of use of assembly language

C combines all the power of assembly language with the ease of use of assembly language

C combines all the power of assembly language with the ease of use of assembly language

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.

The perfect computer has been developed. You just feed in your problems and they never come out again.

So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me

Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known.

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.

If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track

Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.

Not only is there no God, but you try getting a plumber at weekends.

Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it.

The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.

The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.

Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.

Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.

Opportunities multiply as they are seized.

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

He managed to stupid himself right into the White House.

He managed to stupid himself right into the White House.

He managed to stupid himself right into the White House.

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.

Premature optimization is the root of all evil.

Premature optimization is the root of all evil.

Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

The truth is more important than the facts.

A state of war only serves as an excuse for domestic tyranny.

A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.

A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.

A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.

If the United Nations once admits that international disputes can be settled by using force, then we will have destroyed the foundation of the organization and our best hope of establishing a world order.

If the United Nations once admits that international disputes can be settled by using force, then we will have destroyed the foundation of the organization and our best hope of establishing a world order.

Linux is like living in a teepee. No Windows, no Gates, Apache in house.

To jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war.

The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.

Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!

Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.

Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.

I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

Real Programmers always confuse Christmas and Halloween because Oct31 == Dec25 !

The cynics are right nine times out of ten.

Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.

If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.

If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.

If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.

He managed to stupid himself right into the White House.

Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.

A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

Far too many development shops are run by fools who succeed despite their many failings.

The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems.

Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems.

Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems.

Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.

Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.

Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.

Pardon him, Theodotus; he is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.

Pardon him, Theodotus; he is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.

Pardon him, Theodotus; he is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.

The worst barbarity of war is that it forces men collectively to commit acts against which individually they would revolt with their whole being.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

We totally deny the allegations, and we are trying to identify the allegators.

We totally deny the allegations, and we are trying to identify the allegators.

I hate those men who would send into war youth to fight and die for them; the pride and cowardice of those old men, making their wars that boys must die.

The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

One out of every three Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of two of your best friends. If they are OK, then it must be you.

I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.

Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees.

Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees.

Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees.

Behind every great fortune there is a crime.

Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.

I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three of them.

Real Programmers always confuse Christmas and Halloween because Oct31 == Dec25 !

The cry has been that when war is declared, all opposition should be hushed. A sentiment more unworthy of a free country could hardly be propagated.

The cry has been that when war is declared, all opposition should be hushed. A sentiment more unworthy of a free country could hardly be propagated.

The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the question of whether a submarine can swim.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

The perfect computer has been developed. You just feed in your problems and they never come out again.

Far too many development shops are run by fools who succeed despite their many failings.

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.

We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbor like you like to be liked yourself.

We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbor like you like to be liked yourself.

Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance

In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear.

In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear.

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.

Computers are useless; they can only give you answers.

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.

Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.

About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.

Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.

I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.

Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together.

Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together.

A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.

Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.

Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

It is the job of thinking people not to be on the side of the executioners.

It is the job of thinking people not to be on the side of the executioners.

If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.

To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter.

A state of war only serves as an excuse for domestic tyranny.

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.

I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.

Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.

It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.

It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.

It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.

It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.

&gt; &gt; &gt; Goodbye to all! Thanks for years of great fun and good &gt; &gt; &gt; business! &gt; &gt; Suicide or MS C++? &gt; Is there a difference? Suicide hurts only once...

&gt; &gt; &gt; Goodbye to all! Thanks for years of great fun and good &gt; &gt; &gt; business! &gt; &gt; Suicide or MS C++? &gt; Is there a difference? Suicide hurts only once...

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I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

We totally deny the allegations, and we are trying to identify the allegators.

The years of peak mental activity are undoubtedly between the ages of four and eighteen. At four we know all the questions, at eighteen all the answers.

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?

When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world.

If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.

Our children are not born to hate, they are raised to hate.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.

A picture is worth a thousand words (which is why it takes a thousand times longer to load...)

The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently

In this war &Acirc;– as in others &Acirc;– I am less interested in honoring the dead than in preventing the dead.

The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.

The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.

I have spoken many a word, therefore, it is fact.

The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.

The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.

Not only is there no God, but you try getting a plumber at weekends.

Real Programmers always confuse Christmas and Halloween because Oct31 == Dec25 !

Real Programmers always confuse Christmas and Halloween because Oct31 == Dec25 !

Real Programmers always confuse Christmas and Halloween because Oct31 == Dec25 !

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.

In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear.

In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear.

I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.

Comedy is nothing more than tragedy deferred.

Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.

Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.

Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.

Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.

A poem is never finished, only abandoned.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.

It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.

As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air &Acirc;— however slight &Acirc;— lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.

As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air &Acirc;— however slight &Acirc;— lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.

As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air &Acirc;— however slight &Acirc;— lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees.

There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.

Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.

Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.